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Life in a Cat house

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Stan Johnson - Life in a Cat House

Life at our house does not totally revolve around the cats. Or cat at the present time, since for now Ozrow is the only one. We try to tell him he is not actually the center of the universe, although he thinks he is.
Maybe we do devote too much time and attention to him, but he believes he is well worth it. I suppose we think so, too; if we didn’t we would not lavish so much attention on him.
It’s amazing how a cat can take over a house and the people living in it. Ozrow sure did that, even though when he arrived we had three other cats. He was in such bad shape the first few days he couldn’t walk, but once he began to recover he displayed all the fine qualities people want in cats. And once he was established as a favorite he took full advantage of it.
My wife, Vivian, often says Ozrow is the best kitty of all time. That’s probably true, although he does require a lot of care to meet all his demands on our time and energy. He is probably the leading topic of conversation at our house. Part of it is us talking about him and part is us talking to him.
The normal things we say about him relate to his whereabouts.
“Where’s the cat? Is he in or out?”
“I don’t know. I’ve lost track, but I let him in a few minutes ago.”
“Yeah, but he went back out again, I think. Or maybe he’s on the bed.”
What we say to him the most involves his trips inside after a jaunt outdoors. He jumps up on a special shelf outside the window, which indicates he wants to come indoors. But it doesn’t tell us when. So, a sort of conversation with between people and cat consists of us hollering out the door.
“Come on, Ozrow.”
“Get in here if you are coming.”
He then jumps off to the ground, but gets sidetracked by a passing bug.
“Quit fooling around and get in here, you stupid cat.”
He jumps up on the deck and stops about a foot from the door to look around.
“Are you coming or not?”
He finally struts through the door with his tail stuck up in the air.
“It’s about time you made it after all that fooling around.”
He strolls across the floor to his food dish, where he takes three bites. Then he heads back to the door, indicating he wants to go outside again.
“Are you sure you want to go back out? You just came in 20 seconds ago.”
With only minor variations, this goes on numerous times a day.
Ozrow has us well trained. His constant running in and out is a nuisance but we do it every time. He doesn’t mind if we complain, as long as we comply with his wishes. He has a real talent to turning a deaf ear toward our grumbling.
He has grown accustomed to being the sole cat, so things might change when the kitten arrives. I suppose he will remain as the center of his own kitty kingdom, but he will have to share some of our attention. The kitten will probably be a typical cat and expect to be the center of the household.